Above: Kanye West looking stunned after being told his career was found in Kim Kardashian’s vadge.
Kim Kardashian’s vagina is like a black hole, a singularity with so much mass and density that it sucks in and crushes anything that comes too close to its gravitational pull, even light. And Kanye West’s career has passed the Event Horizon and is being sucked in like its caught in the Death Star’s tractor beam. At least that’s what the New York Daily News is saying, without the cool science analogy. Read on:
A Confidenti@l that West’s popularity is waning and he has become tainted, with too many appearances on “Keeping Up With the Kardashians,” pictures in the celebrity weeklies and a girlfriend unwelcome in the world of high fashion.
They said ‘taint.’
Once gracing the pages of VMAN and GQ, his face is now splattered all over whatever Kardashian is promoting.
“His personal life is overpowering his music,” an industry source says. “Every time he plays, people are wondering if Kim is going to be there. It’s not a good thing for him, especially if he wants to be taken seriously.”
In Kanye’s last public appearance he pranced around in one of Kim’s leather skirts. And no, that shit was not a ‘kilt,’ don’t even try to pull that one. I take chlamydia seriously; not Kanye.
In the beginning of their relationship, West tried to put his foot down when it came to appearing on the Kardashian family’s shows. “He made it clear to her he doesn’t want to be on her show, but Kim gets upset so he caves in,” adds the source.
So let this be a lesson to all of you out there: Being around Kim Kardashian will ultimately cause your life to unravel in a death spiral. Ask her cat.