What About the Children?

Image

Is that…Honey, grab the children and get in the car, and for God’s sake, avert your eyes!

LeAnn Rimes took a break from harassing people on Twitter and shitting on little girl’s dreams to attend her step son’s baseball game. And in true step mom fashion, LeAnn paraded herself around the ball field in pleather short shorts that said “I may not have borne children myself, but I’m certainly capable of embarrassing the shit out these kids as good as their real mom.”

The worst thing about the whole getup is those are soccer shorts. Christ LeAnn, if you’re going to dress like a cat-house whore on theme day at a children’s sporting event, at least get the fucking sport right. 

You can almost read this poor kid’s thoughts: “Look straight ahead, don’t turn your head, even if she talks to you. If you turn your head you might see something you don’t want to. Something that will turn you off to women forever, and we’re not ready for that…yet.”

Image:Fame/Flynet

Brandi Glanville and LeAnn Rimes Continue to Work Out Their Problems Like Adults

Image

Brandi Glanville and LeAnn Rimes have been passive-aggresively feuding with each other via Twitter for months, and they continued their tradition into the New Year when this exchange took place between the two during Brandi’s interview on Watch What Happens Live where she said LeAnn was insane. And you know LeAnn just couldn’t resist watching because Brandi’s pretty right on with that assertion.

“Wow the texts from my friend,” LeAnn tweeted while the show was airing on the West Coast. “KISSES and KMA,” as in, “Kiss My A**.”

LeAnn likes to pretend she has friends,and that these ‘friends’ tell her everything Brandi says and does to get under her skin. Because that’s what friends do.

Never one to take the higher road, Brandi called out LeAnn’s supposed Twitter addiction, tweeting:  “I love you.. No! U! Yes I really do!!!! Im in love with my twitter and i will NEVER leave u for ‘tweehab’ gdnt biddy!”

Ironic, No? Watching two grown women act like tweens hurling under-handed insults indirectly though a social media sight really begs the question: Why the fuck do these two follow each other on Twitter?

Image:By Yahoo! Blog  Uploaded by MyCanon (LeAnn Rimes) [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

Brandi Glanville Gives Dating Advice

Image

Real Housewife and former model Brandi Glanville’s husband, Eddie Cibrian, left her to be with LeAnn Rimes, who looks like Gollum with a blonde wig. So I’m not sure she’s qualified to give advice on anything, except maybe how to be so insufferable that sex with LeAnn Rimes somehow seems palatable.

But that didn’t stop old Brandi from dishing it out anyways, via Twitter:

“2 drink max on 1st dates,NEVER wear cute chonies esp. If he is super HOT,dont talk about ex’s&be who u r not who u think he wants u2b ;),”

Thanks Brandi, if you had taken the time to actually spell out the words you might have enough for a book. And if you ever take Brandi out on a date, just remember that she’s wearing granny panties.

Image: Twitter_@brandiglanville

Douche of the Week

Image

I was going to let LeAnn Rimes slide for her warbled yodeling rendition of ‘How do I Live” on the X-Factor, she only ruined a little girls life, but that’s okay, I don’t really like kids anyway. She could have just shut up about it, but in order to save what little reputation she has left she’s attempting some damage control and blaming the embarrassingly bad performance on the girl she was there to help, 13-year-old Carly Rose Sonenclar.

From TMZ: (LeAnn’s) rep gave us a quote that we were told we could put on TMZ.com and attribute to LeAnn Rimes. We were told LeAnn was NOT impaired and if there was any awkwardness it was only because “I was trying to help this 13-year-old girl who was having some trouble with the song.”

Now LeAnn is on Twitter saying this quote was not attributed to her, tweeting  “It’s a shame that gossip and lies are overshadowing the performance of Carly.”

Way to deflect LeAnn, try to get everyone to forget about that shit you took on a little girl’s head, by saying that shit you took on her head is overshadowing her.

I don’t know if LeAnn was drunk or not, maybe she was just out of breath from squeezing her butt cheeks together really hard to keep from pooping her pants.  What I do know is this:  Carly Rose spent the last several months practicing daily and working on her chops for this performance. LeAnn has spent the last several years smoking cigarettes, stealing husbands, losing weight, filing vexatious lawsuits and harrassing people on Twitter.  I think we all know who carried who through that performance. Hint: It wasn’t LeAnn.  And for that LeAnn Rimes is The Douche of the Week!