Tag Archives: Pam Anderson Dancing on Ice

Pam Anderson’s Boobs Got Her Kicked Off Dancing On Ice

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Pamela_Anderson1Well that was fast.  Four days after I told you Pamela Anderson was so desperate for cash she was doing Dancing On Ice in the UK, she was voted off the show.  Pam managed to skate for a grand total of 150 seconds before everyone decided they had seen enough and sent her packing.  It must have been when her gigantic, pumpkin-colored, saline sack of a breast slipped out of her top during her performance.  Put ’em way Pam, those things expired in 2002.

Don’t cry for old Pam, she got paid £150,000 for appearing on the show, which comes out to £1,000 a second.

A source told the Daily Mirror: ‘Pammy is the biggest star we have had in years and we hoped she would pull in millions of viewers for weeks and weeks. Her skating partner Matt Evers flew to America for weeks of training.

‘We had to book first class flights for her and source plush accommodation for months too in case she got to the final stages. All in all we’ve spent about £150,000 on Pammy and she has lasted one week. It’s a disaster.’

Aren’t all these contests supposed to be rigged anyways?  If they spent so much money on her why couldn’t they just have the judges keep her around? We Americans have been tolerating this shit for years, how the hell else do you think Fantasia Barrino became a ‘star?’

Image:By Boeing978 (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

Pamela Anderson Will do Anything For a Buck… Anything

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ImageWe don’t hear a whole lot about Pamela Anderson these days, mostly because it’s not 1994, and we have younger, hotter messes to worry about.  But there’s another reason too.  Pam’s been hanging out across the pond, that’s teabag speak for the Atlantic Ocean, where she’s been doing club openings and theater in the UK, as well as Dancing on Ice; the British version of Dancing With the Stars, but with ice skates, and on ice.

Why? Because bitch is broke, that’s why. According  to the Mirror, Pam owes so much in back taxes and renovation costs on her home she’s been doing club appearances for £15,000. I don’t how much money that is in dollars; I write a shitty blog, I’m not an accountant.

And even though the venues aren’t as glamorous as say, Tommy Lee’s opium den, Pam is still bringing the diva attitude. From the Mirror:

“She doesn’t like photos unless they’re taken with a ring flash – a flattering photographic device to soften the subject’s features and create a halo effect.

In fact, such is her hatred of the humble mobile phone photo that her people instruct club owners to try to ban people from wielding them near her.

A HARD task, you’d imagine, when faced with hundreds of boozed-up revellers clamouring for her ­attention in a confined space.

‘Pamela is very clear what she does and doesn’t want. Her image is very important to her and unflattering photos with wrong cameras are a big no-no,’ says a friend.”

Christ Pam, those people are drunk, not blind. The only thing that could be done to make you look better in a picture is to leave the lens cap on.

Image:By Boeing978 (Own work) [CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons