Nooooo!!!!!!!!!!!

As if anyone needed another reason to purchase a semi-automatic weapon and a high-capacity magazine at a gun show without a background check, Sean ‘Diddy’ Combs is reportedly dating Kate Upton.

(Note: That was in no way an endorsement of violence against P-Doodly.)

According to @Confidential via the NYDN, Combs and Upton were spotted making out in Miami in March and were later spotted dining together in New York City.

So, American hero and Golden Child, Kate Upton, is dating the rap world’s original smug douchebag. Move over Kanye, someone’s about to be relevant again.

In related news, Kris Jenner was asking around about getting a voodoo doll with big tits and blonde hair.