Teen Mom Jenelle Evans Arrested for Heroin Possession, No Surprise There

Jennelle Evans Mugshot

The producers at MTV have a gift for canvassing the nation’s special education classrooms in order to find suitable degenerates to catapult into the national spotlight and remind us all how fucked up our society really is. It’s like a divine gift.

So there shouldn’t be any eyebrows raisedabout the star of Teen Mom 2, Jenelle Evans being arrested for possession of heroin and assault. Again. According to TMZ:

Cops discovered 12 bindles of heroin in Jenelle’s possession when they arrived to her home following an alleged domestic dispute with her husband, Courtland Rogers. 

Ha! Those crazy kids and their ‘domestic disputes.’ But wait, there’s more!

Evans was also found to be illegally in possession of Percocet (a prescription painkiller) … as well as plastic wrapping paper and a glass smoking pipe, which is considered illegal drug paraphernalia.

As for the assault charge, cops say Evans struck Rogers with a piece of furniture during a domestic dispute.  Rogers was arrested too — cops say he assaulted Jenelle by “hitting her on the neck and striking her with a closed fist on her head.”

Cops say Rogers was also in possession of heroin with intent to manufacture, sell, distribute … and drug paraphernalia.

According to police, both Evans and Rogers denied possession of the heroin … which is why they were both charged.

At the time of her arrest, 21-year-old Evans was also served with a warrant for failing to pay child support. 

Naturally, radaronline is reporting that Jenelle claims to have been set-up by her on-and-off again husband Courtland Rogers. Because why would a person who passes the responsibility of raising her child on to her parents, while also refusing to pay any money for the care of their child, have any accountability when it comes to something like drug possession?

“You mean I can’t just give this baggie to my mom and have her do the sentence for me? Thanks for nothing, mom. God, I hate you!”

Jenelle Evans is Back on the Market Single Guys


Above: Jenelle Evans and her soon-to-be-ex-husband of three weeks, Courtland Rogers, present a compelling case for proponents of forced sterilization.

I don’t really keep up with Teen Mom on MTV because 1.)MTV sucks and I feel old and out of touch when I watch it and  2.) The name of the show says it all. So I was dumbfounded when I heard today that heroin junkie, Jenelle Evans, and that guy with the neck tattoos that she married three weeks ago after  a two week engagement were already calling it quits.

What went wrong you two?  Why couldn’t you make this work?  You had so much in common,  felony charges, unstable personalities, substance abuse, and the combined mental acuity of a pack of Marlboro Lights.  I can’t think of a better argument for the eugenics movement.

And of course, the relationship’s meltdown all went down in 144-character accusations via Twitter when Jenelle tweeted…aww fuck, I can’t do this. You can check her Twitter if you want  to sort through the jumbled rants and misused homophones of a drug-addled twat, but I’m drawing a line. (@PBandJennelley_1)

Image: Twitter – @PBandJennelley_1