The President Can Party Harder Than Anybody

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After two days of inaugural balls and formalities the President and First Lady would be ready for some rest and relaxation. But Barack Obama is the first black president and this mother-fucker has swagger, so instead him and Michelle partied their faces off until 3 a.m. with a bunch of celebrities, and Bill Clinton was there too! From Page Six:

Barack and Michelle danced past 3 a.m. at the spectacular private bash in the East Room for their closest friends and supporters.

One guest told us, “The president and Usher had a dance-off to ‘Gangnam Style’ along with Janelle Monáe. The president was a good dancer, but Usher threw down some amazing Michael Jackson-style moves.

“They played ‘Single Ladies.’ and all the women were dancing, led by Michelle. Later, everyone lined up and did the electric slide, and the president led a party line around the room. Most people did the conga with him. The only people who weren’t dancing were Bill Clinton (without Hillary), Timothy Geithner and John Kerry.

“Pick any party you’ve ever been to, this was a thousand times better,” our source said.

I’m almost speechless after reading this. A dance off with Usher? Bill Clinton quietly masturbating in the corner? Do you expect me to believe anyone still does the electric slide?  This is some serious bragging here. A thousand times better than any party I’ve ever been to? I mean the 1987 Continental Maritime annual company picnic didn’t have Usher, but it did have a bounce house. I didn’t hear any mention of a bounce house in that story.