This Will Last

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For those of you who still believe in true love, Jesse “Gutter Scum” James got married for the fourth time over the weekend to Alexis DeJoria. Who, despite that name, isn’t a call girl or stripper. In fact, she a drag racer, I looked into this hoping it meant she was a dude who tucked her junk in order to run hurdles against other dudes, but it just means she drives a car really fast in a straight line. But she’s a woman, so she probably doesn’t do that very well. I know the limitations of my sex.